Masochistic Perceptions, Trials and Truths

These are my cyberfied cerebral synapses ricocheting off reality as I perceive it: thoughts, opinions, passions, rants, art and poetry...

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

An Opportunity to Create Change





I was ecstatic last week when I was approached by my Assistant Principal and asked to submit a proposal to our Parents Advisory Committee for a "Yoga" option to be offered next year at our school. I am affectionately teased quite often by my colleagues because of my espousing of Yoga and Buddhist ideas, compounded by the fact that I am a vegetarian. I think that they think it rather novel that a 6'1", 210 lb former Prison Guard who played professional and international Rugby could be the fluffy fellow that I am. I used to get the gears big time in high school, playing for the school Football team while fronting in a Punk Rock band. Even my students will comment "how can you be this creative Art teacher who's all nice, and then be a drill sergeant of a Rugby coach?"



I must say, I have often struggled with the dualistic nature of being in both the Artistic and gentle side of things on one half of the coin, while on the other side having a reputation as being the "big guy" when things go to hell in a hand-basket. I think the latter is a curse and something I've always been self-conscious of as I have never been a violent or aggressive individual in the slightest. In fact, I am usually off the wall, taking few things seriously and tend to be known more for my humour than anything else – heck, I write poetry and do Yoga!

Right, Yoga. I have digressed.

So, for the past couple of years, when we've been doing our planning as a staff for the next school year, I have written down that I would like to offer a "Yoga and Holistic Living" course. Given the inner city demographic of where I teach, and the high number of special needs students, I have often thought that such an option would be invaluable (in fact I have done some of this stuff with my special needs kids with amazing results!). Anyway, I think my Administrators figured that I was hamming it up (funny for a vegetarian, but pork was the meal the Buddha ate before he died…), and it was not until this past week that they asked me to officially put something down.

…So, what follows is what I slapped down in a matter of 20 minutes during my prep in a rather giddy frame of mind. For a first draft, rough proposal, I am happy with it. The reason that I have decided to publish this outline here is to simply allow others to view it, give me feedback and, ultimately, to inspire them to take this idea and spread it around within their communities and schools.
My idea is based on my observations of children today. They are raised in a high speed culture, fast food, energy drinks, etc. ADHD is on the rise for a plethora of reasons, and growing up today is a bit more dangerous than when I was a wee lad with all the drugs, gangs, etc. They are trying to find themselves and gain acceptance. They need ways to express themselves in a positive way, and to accept/understand their feelings. Further to this, we all know that metacognition definitely helps us out in our learning, and relationships (a reciprocal tandem of understanding ourselves and others) are the key to happiness and success.


At the end of the day, life does not come with an instruction manual. If we can offer these ideas and habituate a daily practice, who knows what the results could be… I'd love to find out!
So, here it goes….



Yoga and Positive Living Half Year Option
Created by Ed Meers BA, BEd.


The purpose of the Yoga and Positive Living half year option is to introduce students to a combination of skills that will assist them in:


• Developing a sense of self awareness
• Understand how our thought processes work and influence the way we perceive the world
• Examine peaceful conflict resolution skills and awareness of others
• Learn a number of stress management and focusing techniques that students can practice every day

There will be three central components of this course:


1. An introduction to the theory and practice of Yoga
2. Examination of how our brain/mind works based on both Eastern Philosophies and Western Psychological Research
3. An introduction to meditation practice, visualisation techniques and stress reduction exercises

Students will be assessed based on:


• Written assignments and projects reflecting the teachings from class
• Participation in class activities
• Misc. other things including maintaining of journals, etc.


Course requirements:


• Access to both a classroom and larger space such as the small gym
• Preferably set up as a double block
• Approximately 25-30 Yoga mats, depending on the number of students enrolled

Course outline:


In the beginning, this course will start off heavier on the theory side of things, examining ideas from both Psychology and Eastern Philosophy as they relate to how our minds work. Some asana (Yoga positions) and meditation practice.
As the course progresses, students will move more into a practical application of teachings and develop them through doing.


Throughout the semester we will have guest speakers from the community come in to speak with students about a number of related issues.


Please note that this is NOT a course of a religious nature. While aspects of Buddhism, Hinduism and other religions will be discussed, it will not be done so in a manner that would be offensive to any faith and is not intended to convert students!

About Mr. Meers, course designer and Instructor:


• Possess extensive formal and informal training in Philosophy and Psychology, in addition to being a School Teacher for several years
• Over a decade of Yoga training and many years of Martial Arts training
• Extensive study of Buddhism who has a daily Yoga and Meditation practice, in addition to having published several articles on-line in this field
Former Hostage and Crisis Negotiator with Corrections Canada

Friday, April 17, 2009

Corporatism and the Decline of Canadian Civilisation

It seems like everyone that I speak to as of late is exhausted, like they've hit a "wall". True, many of whom with which I converse are Teachers, and as we enter the final couple of months of school, things are hectic compounded by the year thus far (and remember, I teach special needs at a junior high!). But it's not just my colleagues who feel this way. People in a plethora of other professions have been saying the same thing – that they are feeling worn out. Granted, this is Edmonton where we have just endured a long, harsh winter, and we now find ourselves at the time of year where you are out in shorts and a t-shirt one day, the next it's hovering around freezing with snow. While all these are contributing factors, I don't believe that they are the catalyst of this professed fatigue.

I think that the way we work is the main culprit, forcing this fatigue on many people. No matter the profession, it seems that most middle class folks are working harder and longer in corporate structures that offer little in return. As prices go up, wages do not keep pace, yet is seems the hours of work required and demands also are escalating.

Corporate structure is a central component of this issue. The whole corporate structure sucks the humanity out of us and… well, just sucks. I've worked in many different corporate cultures, and they all seem to be the same. Things come down from up top, filling the peons plates to overflowing with little consultation from or consolation for them. As well, organisations attempt to control their employees via a central office, further detaching themselves from what's happening on the ground. Sadly, the employees tend to take this, offering little opposition as they have been manicured through the corporate structure, realising that it is usually the "yes" folk who advance and the talented, free thinkers who are the first to be made redundant or are punished for their outspokenness. Often when one takes a stand, the others will both admire and be terrified at the same time of their taking on the system, and shy away.

This carries on through society as well, where we see the toll taken on creativity. Compare the architecture of 50 years ago to the box stores of today – identical and much like the cubicle offices many of us work in. The Arts have gone from being an integral part of life to something that is either on the Bohemian fringe or for the elite. Independent businesses have conceded to chain stores.

Scarier still is observing our bystander mentality. I've seen people walk past an elderly person needing help, ignoring their plight. I've seen people call for help and people just walking by. I've also seen the fascination of casualty vampires who gape at the misfortune of others once the authorities have arrived. We, ultimately, see what is happening and shy timidly away.

I also find the general conformity of society to be increasing, whether through fashionable trends or "isms". Canadian politics is a prime example of this – yes men telling us what they think we want to hear so that they can be elected as national CEO's. It appears that we are all walking with sticks up our bottoms in an effort to conform and be acceptable.

With this has come fear and the decline of debate on issues in general. Again, this is a corporate mentality of fitting in and not wishing to rock the boat. Honestly, President Obama was such a breath of fresh air, even though he's not my leader, in that he proclaimed things that many people were thinking, but were terrified to say. Honestly, when is the last time we've had firebrand leaders who were willing to state "this is who I am and what I stand for – if you like it, then vote for me"?

The result of all this corporatisation has also lead to people being dissatisfied, and that wears you down. We are not encouraged to show passion or to be expressive. So this goes unnurtured, leaving many to search half-heartedly for more in life. And the corporations take advantage of that too whether through the marketing of self-help books like "The Secret" or through prescribing anti-depressant medications. There's billions and careers being made on this stuff!

This ultimately permeates in every aspect of our lives – relationships, family, etc. Why do so many have extramarital affairs? Because they are looking for that rush, that passion. When with someone for a long time, existing 45+ hours per week as a drone in our jobs, it's hard to come home and find a spark – especially if you are trying to raise children. Trust me, it's hard coming home after a full day of teaching to a family. Many parents, throw in the towel, allowing the TV and video games to raise their children, resulting in the dysfunction and underachievement that we witness today. It's an effort to spend an hour or so doing homework and reading to my child, but it is my obligation to her as a parent, I love her more than anything and that's my inspiration. Most families simply give in to what is easiest, however, which I can understand to a large extent, but can not condone.

Then there's how we socialise. Many folks are on the computer all day at work, and then socialise on it all night. The Internet is such an amazing tool that could be a massive hub of creative activity, but, ultimately, the majority use it to send updates on Facebook stating "so-and-so is wondering whether so-and-so will be voted off American Idol". People are social, pack animals. This is how we established our civilisations. We require that face to face time; to be in the presence of other living human beings, making eye contact, etc.

And just like we are policed at work with expectations of conformity and "professionalism", we live that way outside of work as well. Just look at how we function – the legislating of social regulations, the campaign to live forever, etc. We have so many ideals forced upon us that soon we will all be existing in bubbles. We need laws, but we also need the freedom and ability to choose. We are easily distracted by various campaigns such as anti-smoking, the while remaining silent about industrial pollution, the oil sands, etc. because to be critical of these things is to rock the boat, peeve of the corporations and, in the end, be threatened with job losses. I understand that living healthy is a positive thing, but we all seem to think that we must live puritanical lives and this will help us live until we are 100. Honestly, how many of us really want to live to be 100? I don't want to die, but I don't want to be old, suffering from dementia whiling away forever in a body that can no longer enjoy life. This terrifies me. I love life and am grateful for it as I know I won't live forever. Thus, I want to drain every ounce out of living while I can. When the tank is empty, then I'm done. I wear a helmet when I bike, a rope when I climb, and so on, but, at the end of the day, if I care to indulge in a bit of vice then I will.

Everyone remembers a moment – in school, at a meeting, a social gathering – when we've been bored. This is what the corporate lifestyle/culture is doing to us. We are all exhausted because we need stimulation – we are bored or burned out most of the time. To escape, some submerge themselves in vice (as opposed to simply indulging a bit for pleasure), turn to hard drugs, cheat on their spouses, etc. In the end, just like a holiday, we still return to that grind that is becoming or has become our lives. Personally, I hate the notion of "holidays" as that suggests an escape from life. As stated earlier, we don't live forever, so every moment should be special, not just a week every other year, relaxing by a pool. I don't want to escape my life, I want to live it!

How do we do it? How do we provoke change? There's many ways. We need to make the places we live stimulating by avoiding the cookie cutter set up the suburbs, and having unique places to go and things to do. We need to make face time with friends. We need to leave work at the end of the day having worked hard, but not to the point of being burnt out. Then, in the evenings, we need to socialise with our friends and families – play board games, go walk the dogs and have coffee or a bottle of wine together – not run ourselves ragged with a thousand commitments. Read instead of watching TV, or, if you do watch TV, have standards. There's nothing wrong with a bit of brain candy, but if that's all you feed it, then, just like our bodies, the results will not be very healthy. Not all the time, but at least a couple times a month you need to push yourself outside your boundaries/comfort zone or even do something that scares you. Enjoy things responsibly. Develop opinions and challenge them. Volunteer. Be active. Stand up for yourself. Say what you mean and don't pander to ideas that don't seem right to you (political correctness is rife with this!). It's your life. Remember, you may live to be 100, but what's the point if you haven't really lived at all? Travel. Be considerate of others, but don't be ruled by their opinions. Write letters to the Editor. Start a blog to express your ideas. Be giving, loving and compassionate. Do not fear authority, but rather demonstrate that authority is responsible to you. Fight for what you believe is right – at the end of the day, you need to like who you see in the mirror!

I admit, I have always existed on the periphery of society. I was a punk rocker when it was an underground thing. I read torturous books and philosophy for fun. Oftentimes I am a shit disturber in the organisations of which I am part, who usually becomes disenfranchised by the silence of the lambs and eventually leaves. Perhaps I am arrogant or just plain stupid. I do know that I have a lot of frustration and feel like screaming at the world when I see the waste. I let my passions and emotions rule me quite often. I am bizarre, a freak and someone who cares very much for people, yet I want to shake them, flip the bird to authority and begin a revolution that could never exist. Perhaps my inability to conform is an illness. But this is the reality within which I exist. I believe the world can be better – a world of peace and fulfillment. I want people to be happy. So, in doing my part, I offer the words which I have written. Do as you will with them.

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Sunday, April 05, 2009

Evolving Beliefs

So many things affect our perspectives on life: experiences, things we read, age, education, attitude, etc. Over the past decade and a bit, I have been doing a lot of soul searching. Though baptised in the United Church during infancy, I had little in terms of a religious upbringing, save for a couple of years attending Sunday School at a local Anglican church when I was 5 or 6 years of age. By the tween years, through adolescence and into my early 20's, I was very much a non-theist. This became deeper ingrained as I discovered Punk Rock, Socialism, Camus and Existentialism in high school, followed by several Philosophy courses in University. I did read the Bible cover to cover in my second year of university, but that was to gain a better insight into my English degree as it appeared every literary reference was either to the Bible or "Paradise Lost".

University also introduced me to psychologists such as Jung, and a bit from the Eastern Philosophical cannon, which ultimately held considerable sway in my spiritually formative years of my late twenties and early thirties. The mentality and non-dogmatic approaches to these ways of understanding our world are best summed up in the Buddha's words: "Believe nothing, regardless of where you read it or who said it… unless it agrees with your own reason and common sense." It is very obvious why this approach to spirituality would resonate with me, given the peace-nick-punk rock perspective from which I was approaching the subject.

So, by my late twenties I was distilling Eastern ideology in my brain and foraging a path where I could apply what I was absorbing. By my early thirties, I began to identify myself as being a Buddhist. By my late thirties, I found defining my beliefs slightly more difficult as there were so many contributing thoughts contributing to my beliefs, borrowing from pagan traditions, Hinduism and an assortment of psychological theories. On top of this, I had a decade of Martial Arts and Yoga under my belt, had suffered from anxiety and depression, started a family, and had experienced several extremes in my life ranging from travel to being a Correctional Officer to becoming a special needs Teacher.

The journey has continued to evolve now in my early forties. I find it difficult to call myself a Buddhist, as my beliefs are so complex and varied. For example, I became a vegetarian (pescatarian actually) again a ways back. People are always quick to jump on me when they learn that I do eat fish and seafood, and argue that it should be all or nothing, and that I'm not very Buddhist (by the way, the Buddha had pork for his last meal). In the end, perhaps I'm not trying to "be Buddhist" on a subconscious level (on which I will elaborate in a bit). My justification is to state that I will only eat what I would myself be prepared to kill, and, if I elect to take a life, I must honour it by using the entire animal. Many of my uncles were hunters and farmers, and I have actively participated in the slaughter of animals with them. Given the choice, I simply elect to use meat alternatives over the raising of animals for slaughter. It's as simple as that. I believe that meat (and fish) farming is not an environmentally healthy practise, and it is not cost effective in feeding the world (i.e. comparing the yield of a soya crop to the raising of a single cow).

Perhaps even more extreme is my belief that sometimes the death penalty is warranted and the most compassionate course of action. I by no means advocate death for everyone convicted of murder as there are always extenuating circumstances. However, I do believe that "monsters" do exist and that they do need to be put down for the safety of society and those tasked with their care. I am not going to elaborate on the nitty gritty of this here, but rather wish to offer it as another example of how my experiences have led me to where I am at. No matter how poignant our arguments or the passions with which we press them, we can not revise another's perception, and our perception is our reality.

Inevitably, with my indulgence into Buddhism, Yoga, etc., I also began to embrace many things in Eastern culture. This is not a bad thing and is all a part of expanding one's world views and adding colour to one's life. The difficulty lies in when our search causes us to try to "become" Eastern, when culturally we are not. I think what really got me thinking on this point was when I heard a statement by the Dalai Lama where he made it clear that he did not want people to convert to Buddhism from other cultures or religions. He continued on to say that everything that Buddhism offers is found in the other main religions of the world: Christianity, Islam, Judaism, etc., and that people need to find these things within their own cultural contexts. It's true that we in the West tend to romanticise Eastern Zen Masters and Guru's – as if they possess some great wisdom that can make everything right in our lives and in the world. We seem to hold Tibet as a type of Mecca, and many Westerners feel like they need to shave their heads/ grow their hair and don saffron robes, traveling Eastward to the "promised lands". It is easy to see how many tend to become even more lost on their spiritual quests as they assume a new identity and the language of "Namaste" and "Om shanti" over who they really are (myself included).

I don't intend this to be either negative or insultory towards these people – again, to each our own reality. I am simply speaking about where I am at with my thinking. I am a strong advocate of meditation, Yoga and reading Eastern Spiritual Philosophy in that I believe that they offer significant positive contributions to our lives and express their sentiments in a language far more accessible than many other spiritual traditions (i.e. there's some great stuff in the Bible, but often it is inaccessible in its presentation). What I am saying is that one needs to apply the teachings in the context of their own lives and culture, through simple principles and daily application – simply trying to be a good person. I hope that I am communicating my message here effectively.

At present, I see much of what I have been doing as far as my own spirituality goes, has been trying to departmentalise my beliefs and consolidate them under some kind of identifiable label – Buddhist. There is obvious irony in my attachment toward this need to self-identify, even though there have always been uncomfortable moments or moments where I felt totally disenfranchised (silent retreats and attending services at the Buddhist temple being prime examples, not to mention Yoga's corporatisation in North America). Perhaps I'm still a punk rocker at heart, but, to simplify things, I draw from the words of the late, great Reggae artist, Peter Tosh: "I am that I am, I am, I am, I am"

In conclusion, perhaps the time has arrived to part with my labels of Yogi, Buddhist, etc., and simply become the collective entity of my self. May the road rise with all of you on your own journeys, and I wish each of you health, peace and happiness.

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