Feverish Rant and Tales of Woe (Along with my picks and recommendations)


Mother Nature is bipolar – it’s obvious given the insane weather swings we are experiencing here with highs in the +30s followed by flooding, tornadoes and evening lows down around +1c. Now I don’t want to get the Fundamentalists all excited as, for certain they are cowboys on the horizon and not the four horsemen of the Apocalypse. Still, one might wonder if Nature is attempting to purge itself of the virus known as Humankind.

On the subject of viruses, I’ve been having a rather unfortunate string of luck as of late. Three weeks ago, while playing third base in a slo-pitch game, the base runner slid in, his cleat catching my big toe and, consequently, fractured a small part of the bone while dislocating the toe at the knuckle. I am not a tough guy, but, honestly, it didn’t hurt as bad as one might imagine. The worst bit was when they froze the toe – three very nasty needles – before popping it back into place.

…Note to emergency rooms: good acoustics are not necessary in your treatment rooms as the snap crackle pop of a joint being put in place is sufficient without all the extra reverb!

So, poop happens and they said I’d be good to go in a couple of weeks, and had an appointment for a follow-up one week later. So, the follow-up day comes and the news is not good. The toe had been dislocated again by a combination of the swelling and bone chip, so, again, the needles to freeze it up before attempting to pop it back (really not a happy camper). This time, the doctor can’t budge it. So, immediately I’m shipped to another hospital where, after sitting for four hours, I’m told to come back the next morning for surgery. This is very bad as I’m a school teacher and I needed to book and prepare for a sub which, unfortunately, fell upon my principal…

So, I return the next day, they put me under and I wake up with a pin protruding out of the end of my toe. I’m told not to go back to work for four weeks and I really start getting pissed off as we have a family holiday planned for San Diego at the end of the month – my first in a very long time! So now my next appointment is June 28th and our flight is June 29th. Yikes!

Anyway, I negotiate with my doctor to go back to work this Monday, and he gave me the green light. Wednesday night I was feeling good (and no, this wasn’t from the T4’s they put me on for pain), so I figured I’d go in a couple days early. So, off goes my alarm at 6 a.m. Thursday morning and I get ready for work, but had a queasy tummy. I figured it must be nerves or something, so I carried on. By mid morning I was projectile vomiting and had a fever, ending up back home in bed where I found myself for most of the day again today. The nice thing about really nasty flues is their very short lifespan. Still, it didn’t do a whole lot for my already fragile psyche (I’m a very active person and the toe lay-up had me squirrelly).

Then there’s the humiliation of the whole toe thing. I mean honestly: slo-pitch! Of all the ways to get injured! To think I gave up Rugby because of the toll it had taken over the years – but there’s glory in a Rugby injury!

Anyway, the flu ties in with my intro, the rest here is verbal diorama and raving. I know these are all very minor ailments – not like having a terrible terminal affliction. Still, we must still have a place to moan about our woes as everything is relevant.

…Note to the Fundamentalist – negotiate a better deal with your Union (the Church) to see if God can’t just tack the sick days onto the end of one’s life and give us the option of living through that or checking out of life early – it would also ease the stress on our healthcare system as well.

Anyway, in closing, here are some things you should check out: Hungarian author Imre Kertész, Toronto F.C. and Feist’s new record: “The Reminder”.

I’ve recently read two novels by the Nobel Prize winning Kertész and loved them (Liquidation and Fatelessness). The author is a Holocaust survivor and has written one of the more poignant accounts of this dark part of history in a style that reminds me of a mix of Kafka and Camus.

Toronto F.C. are the newest MLS Soccer franchise and they not only play exciting soccer, but they have an atmosphere in their stadium that is comparable to European matches. Finally a Canadian Soccer franchise that has approached the game the right way: build a stadium of reasonable size that will create an atmosphere that is not cavernous, don’t give them a dumb name and sod the cheesy gimmicks. The last (failed) professional soccer club in Edmonton was the Edmonton Aviators of the USL. Point one: Aviators is a dumb name (when the club finished the season they were called Edmonton F.C. – is there hope?). Point two: the biggest clubs in the English Premiership, aside for Manchester Scum… er … United (Go Villa!) play in smallish stadiums of 30,000 or so. In Edmonton the… er… Aviators played at Commonwealth Stadium which holds 65,000. Toronto F.C. has used their noggins, built BMO Stadium which seats 20,000 and they’ve sold out every match thus far and have an electric atmosphere. So, if there are any wealthy Edmonton business folk out there that want to campaign for a MLS team here PLEASE use your brains (and pay me a consultant fee of $5,000,000 if you use any of my ideas here) and let’s make EDMONTON CITY F.C. a reality!!!!

Lat off, “The Reminder” by Calgary folk singer Feist is living up to all the hype and play it’s received on CBC – I encourage you all to support real music written about real things by real people as opposed to the quantised computer mixed tripe that is passing for popular music these days.

Heard on the radio that there was a riot at the maximum security prison where I worked up until August of last year with gunfire... ah such a provencial life I'm leading now...

I’m done. Have a good weekend. Out.