Reflections On Feeding My Gecko


This evening I was feeding a live worm to my leopard gecko. I dropped the tanned tubular being into my lizard's tank, and in a flash and a couple sharp tosses of a freckled head, the worm ceased its existence.

When we reflect on this, it offers some perspective on our lives and the absurd nature of our being. In the end, the worm is as much a living thing and a part of the planet as human beings are. Certainly humans are of a far higher intellectual order, but from biological perspective, we are no more or less living than the aforementioned worm and hungry gecko.

It is our nature to present ourselves as having a greater worth or significance over other living things. For one, being ego driven creatures with the ability to think abstractly, it is our subjective nature to make us possess such a self-perception. We place ourselves in our planetary position, because we can, not because we are. Certainly no other creature on the planet contrives gods and their superiority on the planet, as they are simply consumed by their instinct to survive and live according to laws that will ensure the perpetuation of their species. We interpret this difference to infer our superiority and greater life value over the rest of our world. Humans have the ability and thus are compelled to seek the answers to higher order questions, as well as imposing social structures that, while in defense of these theories, creeds and philosophies, often run contrary to nature. Weapons of mass destruction are a clear indication of this. What species, regardless of territoriality, would fabricate the instruments of species extinction? Many of our laws lead to disorder and revolution as they are not true laws of nature, and instinct marred with intellect leads to such conflicts. Religion is, of course, the pinnacle of intellect and reason poisoned by ego and alpha tendencies. There is something to be said in that all the answers we seek are to questions which we have, ourselves, created. To use Pascal's Wager as an allegory: "It does not matter whether or not that I believe God exists". Then there are the words of Friedrich Nietzsche: "The irrationality of a thing is no argument against its existence, rather a condition of it."...and this is life in a nutshell, with all it's perceived complexities.

In the end, the truth is that we are no more or less significant than the worm who, tonight, met its mortal fate. We too shall have our time. This does not mean that we do not value one another and have meaningful relationships, but rather refers to a physical, not emotional, worth. There is a beauty in all of this and, if you really think about it, this is a liberating notion (agreed, driven by the fabrications of intellect and ego). Ours should be of a nature to survive, live in peace and enjoy the fruits of our possibilities without constraint. We need not be weighted down with the sense of divine rights of Kings in relationship to the rest of the world, to gain needless possessions or gain power and ownership over one another. This is all contrary to survival and nothing more than sources of suffering, limitations and living death. We simply are a part of something greater, will have our time, come to pass, be mourned by those who survive us and then are lost to history. Our present significance and issues seem colossal, but, relatively speaking, few things in life truly are. To close in the words of Buddha: "All things appear and disappear because of the concurrence of causes and conditions. Nothing ever exists entirely alone; everything is in relation to everything else." This is all life is and, to live outside of this balance, is futile and nihilistic. In the end, we will one day be consumed by the worm.