Masochistic Perceptions, Trials and Truths

These are my cyberfied cerebral synapses ricocheting off reality as I perceive it: thoughts, opinions, passions, rants, art and poetry...

Friday, May 05, 2006


A fairly taxing week has come to a close and I am feeling refreshed and in a more focused mindset as I return to my regular duties working down in the Hole. The Crisis & Hostage Negotiator training course that I have just completed not only provided me with some seriously needed mental stimulus, but renewed my hopes and career aspirations with the Correctional Service of Canada. I was fortunate to go through this rigorous training with 14 other exceptional candidates. These people came from the Officer ranks as well as other parts of the Service, and represented a figurative spark in the darkness of the great bureaucracy of which I am a part. To work with these people and hear their ideas makes me hopeful that one day they will occupy more significant positions in the Service and bring about the changes that are needed. I also made a few really good friends and had some amazing conversations as well as helped each other go through a plethora of ordeals that seemed to occur in the private lives of my colleagues all at once.

It is interesting to see how positive interactions and experiences spread like a wildfire on a tinder dry prairie. I fell more motivated at present than I have in a very long time and hope that I can keep on riding this wave for a long time to come. Part of this involves supporting others to embark on new experiences, while spending more time on those things that have become mundane, breathing a new life into them. We, as creatures, are funny in how we so often know that certain things make us feel on top of the world, yet neglect to pursue them for some unknown reason. I truly believe that there is a masochist gene in all of us – it’s the one that says “nah, skip the gym and an watch TV”. Being a bit of a fitness addict, I know I feel great when I hit the gym and don’t if I skip it. Honestly ask yourself how many times you have extinguished ambitions by simply not overcoming simple inertia! We all do it.

To have ambition is one thing, but it is like a hyperactive child off its Ritalin when not focused in a direction. I have resolved to further develop my Chess playing from the cerebral side of things, and am definitely going to get into a regular Martial Arts programme - I have been dabbling back into Judo as past enteries denote - as I know that my desire is there. I must keep applying my Chess patience to my physical level of intensity.

Live, develop yourself and love those around you. One life – carpe diem!

Artwork "La Paradise" by Marc Chagall


  • At 8:26 p.m. , Blogger slyqueen said...

    It has been a long time since I seen people who were genuine, who really seemed to care about one another. In the toxic environment we work in, it is refreshing to see people who radiate light. That's something I have not seen in a long time.


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